EMOTIONAL FIRST AID- An essential skill for everyone

EMOTIONAL FIRST AID

Even a little child knows that one must take ‘first-aid’ when injured. It is common knowledge that first aid consists of examining the injury, preventing it from getting worse and determining if further treatment is warranted. For several decades, people have been trained in first aid workshops. This training is provided even to ‘lay persons’. The idea is that help is made available to every person, at all times.

As against this level of care, training and know-how about physical injuries- very little is available for addressing emotional injuries. In fact majority of doctors also do not have any idea about EFA. The end result is that our world is becoming more and more vulnerable to festering and worsening of emotional hurts. Emotional first aid concept was developed in Australia. WHO has promoted emotional first aid training and implementation as one of the important methods for mental health interventions. Emotional first aid is the intervention given to a person who has suffered emotional trauma. It is given immediately after the emotional hurt and before professional help becomes available. Many times, due to effective emotional first aid, professional help becomes unnecessary.

Emotional first aid can be learnt by any intelligent, helping- natured person through a training program. The training consists of learning about working of the mind, nature of emotional trauma and effects of emotional trauma. It will teach the persons to recognise the symptoms of trauma and to determine whether emotional first aid can be administered. Then come the actual skills of emotional first aid. Participants are encouraged to practise their skills as often as possible so that they become experts.

Emotional first aid is actually designed to help persons who have suffered mental trauma. Recipients have reported feeling better upon receiving timely EFA. Not only this, the persons who underwent EFA training also benefitted. They became more conscious about mental health, mental hygiene and were able to take better care of themselves. Hence, even training in EFA helps to improve overall mental health. It is indeed a simple, effective training that all must avail off.

https://www.ted.com/talks/guy_winch_the_case_for_emotional_hygiene?language=en

http://www.amazon.com/Emotional-First-Aid-Rejection-Everyday/dp/0142181072

HELPING A HYPERKINETIC CHILD TO STUDY

Getting a child with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder to study is a challenge in the home and school.

I am copying down some points mentioned in Dr Malvika Kapur's book, which will give parents an idea about how go about organising their studies.

चंचल बच्चों की पढाई का नियोजन करते समय निम्नलिखित मुद्दों का ध्यान रखें. ये मुद्दे घर और पाठशाला दोनों जगहों के लिए हैं. ये मुद्दे डॉ मालविका कपूर, बेंगलोर, इनकी किताबसे है.

1. Reduce distractions in study area ( Study area should be in a quiet place, no TV/ Music/ mobile phones to be allowed), clear the study table and remove distracting posters and displays 
पढ़ने के स्थान पर ऐसी कोई वस्तु नहीं होनी चाहिए जिससे बच्चे का ध्यान बटेगा. उदहारण के तौर पर- मैज पे राखी चीजे, दीवारों पर चित्र, या कमरे में टी व्ही, सेल फोन, इत्यादि का होना.

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2. Structure the task- breal down the study in logical small bits- so it is possible to proceed in a step by step way
पढाई के छोटी खंड बनाये ताकि बच्चा एक- एक कदम पढाई कर पाए

3. Set short term goals. Means give one bit of the task (Write one answer/ do 2 sums, etc)
 पढाई का एक- एक खंड बच्चे को समाप्त करने दे, उसके बाद आगे बढे

4. Break long assignments into small parts so the child can see an end to the work
 बच्चे को पढाई के नियोजन के बारे में बताये ताकि वोह समझ सके की पढाई कब ख़त्म होगी

5. Seat the child near a good role model or 'study buddy' 
बच्चे को अच्छे छात्र के बगल में बिठाये ताकि वह उसका अनुकरण कर सके

6. Use some physical contact with the child, such as hand on the shoulder, or directing arm and hand movements

स्पर्श द्वारा बच्चे को प्रोत्साहित करे- जैसे की सर पे या पीठ पे हाथ रखने, उसका हाथ पुस्तक की ओर बढ़ाना, इत्यादि

7. Avoid teaching at frustration level. Teach at a level that the child can cope with, and at a level that is mildly challenging to the child

बच्चे की क्षमता के मुताबिक ही उसे सिखाये. पाठ न बहुत कठिन ना बहुत आसान होना चाहिए.

8. Be sure the child understands what is being taught

ये निश्चित करे की जो पाठ पढ़ा रहे है, वह बच्चा समझ रहा है

9. teach only when the child is motivated and ready to work and not when child is tired, irritable or wishes to do something else

बच्चा जब पढाई की ओर अभिप्रेरित हो और उसका दिमाग ताज़ा हो, तभी उसकी पढाई ले. जब बच्चा थका हुवा, चिडचिडा हो तब उसकी पढाई न कराये.

10. Shorten the study period to coincide with the attention span of the child.  A timer can be used to measure

उसी इतनी ही पढाई की अपेक्षा करे, जितना की उसका ध्यान रहे. ये समय जानने के लिए घडी का इस्तेमाल कर सकते है.

11. Instruct the child in self- monitoring

बच्चे को अपने- आप पर ध्यान रखना सिखाये

12. Pair written instructions with oral instructions

बच्चे को लिख कर और बताकर पढाई समझाये.

13. Cue child to stay on tasks- means give him signal to return to task when you see his attention wandering

जब भी बच्चे का ध्यान घुमंते हुए नजर आये तो उसे किसी संकेत से ध्यान फिर से पढाई की ओर लाने की आदत डाले 

14. provide ‘seat breaks’, that is, running errands, cleaning blackboard, collect the books, etc

थोड़ी पढाई के बाद रुकने की अनुमति देना, और कोई और छोटे काम जैसे किताबे रखना, फलक साफ़ करना ऐसे काम बताना.

15. allow the child to stand at times while working. This also means to ignore bit fidgetiness, back not straight, little bit of facial movements

अगर बच्चा पढ़ते समय थोडा बहुत खड़ा हो जाये, या मुह बनाये तो उसकी ओर नजरंदाज करना चाहिए

16. use multi sensory teaching approach with specialized teaching materials

विशिष्ठ उपकरानोसे और सीखनेके मध्यमोसे बच्चे को बहु-संवेदिक रूप से सिखाने की कोशिश करें

17. make special effort to keep up their interest and motivation with adequate and immediate reinforcements as they tend to get bored easily

 चंचल बच्चे पढाई से जल्दी ऊब जाते है, उनकी दिलचस्पी बनाये रखने के लिए खास प्रयास करना चाहिए. जैसे की- अछे काम की तुरंत प्रशंसा करना

18. give frequent clear feedback about child’s performance (good, keep it up)

बच्चे के काम के बारे में उसे प्रतिपुष्टि दे, और वह अछे शब्दों में दे

19. be firm, do not allow the child to escape a task that you know he is capable of performing

कभी- कभी बच्चा पढाई करने से मुकर जाता है- उस समय दृढ़ता से उसको डेट रहने की सलाह दे ताकी थोड़ी चुनैतिवाला काम भी करने की उसे आदत पड़ेगी

20. be consistent. Do not alternate between giving in to the child and being form about completing a goal

हर बार एक ही तरह का व्यहार करे. कभी बहुत दयालु कभी बहुत ज्यादा सकती, इस तरह से पढाई न ले.

21. ignore minor impulsive behavior

थोडे- बहुत आवेगशील बर्ताव को नजरंदाज करे

22. use time- out for misbehavior

यदि अभद्र व्यवहार करे तो कुछ मिनिटों के लिए उसे कोने में खड़ा करे.

23. acknowledge positive behavior

अछे बर्ताव की प्रशंसा करे

24. help child organize his daily routine

आपने दैनिक काम- काजोंका नियोजन करना उसे सिखाये

25. look for signs of stress build-up and provide encouragement or reduce work load to alleviate pressure and avoid temper outbursts

यदि बच्चा तना हुआ नजर आये तो उसको थोडा आसान काम दे वरना बच्चा बेचैन हो सकता है और उत्तेजित भी हो सकता है.

An APP for Obsessive compulsive Disorder

http://apps.appmakr.com/knowyourocd

SAFE and UNSAFE touch Guidelines

Modified from list given by Counselor,  PTV school.

Forms of sex abuse-  Touch that feels uncomfortable or unwanted by child, watching sex organs/ nudity or sex acts, talking about sexual topics- whether done by child, to child, in front of child with or without participation or consent of child. Remember that children cannot consent. These are usually imposed by an adult or another much older child.

Children between 2- 6 years engage in ‘exploratory’ sexual play. It is normal developmental milestone where children are trying to explore and understand their surroundings, which includes sexual parts of self and others. Children are found to watch themselves nude in mirror striking different poses or touching themselves, even masturbating. In Nurseries, daycares, or at home when unsupervised they may look at or touch private parts of other children- This is not to be considered as sex abuse. Children are to be gently distracted and their questions to be answered. They are to be educated about not to look or touch other kids, and about limits of behavior. These will be their first lessons in sex education. But if a child older than 7- 8 years is engaging in sexual behavior- this is definitely abnormal and requires further investigation.

Other than that

1.       Children are to be told- nobody in the world, including closest relatives are allowed to touch them or kiss them when child does not want it or in a way that the child dislikes. 

2.       No question of good- bad touch. All unwanted touch should be resisted by child. Other than that parts of body covered by swimming costume are 'private' and no one is allowed to look or touch, or child is not allowed to look or touch of anyone else

3.       Child should be taught to express what makes him/ her uncomfortable. You should support the child if you are with him/ her rather than forcing him to kiss, shake hands, etc with uncle/ aunty/ others

4.       Inform the child that some persons may ask them to keep ‘secrets’, and that in such case child should immediately inform inspite of promising otherwise

5.       Question the motive of any person who shows undue interest in the child showers him/ her with gifts, or if child fears someone. Never keep ANY child alone with any person known to have such tendencies

6.       Be alert about toys, gifts and other items you cannot account for. Be sure to question their appearance

7.       Sometimes child molesters use lies to lure children- such as asking for help, or reporting that their family members are in trouble and they want to take them, etc. Explain to children never to accompany any person, known or unknown without your permission.  Clearly designate a trusted adult whom they may approach if you are not available.

8.       Children showing sexual behaviors and knowledge, injuries or fearfulness are indictors of abuse. Sometimes child may report the abuse. Take immediate cognizance of the child’s report. Your trust and what you do later to protect the child will determine the recovery of child

9.       Teach the child to recognize absolute ownership of their body and mind, and that any unwanted overture is to be resisted immediately and strongly.

10.   Girls and boys, young and adolescent all children are at risk of abuse. Most abuse happens at the hands of known persons who have easy access to the child. So never be too sure that nothing can ever happen to a particular child. Precautions and watchfulness are essential in every case. Educating the child to take care of himself/ herself is the best strategy in this regard.

Internet acronyms every parent should know

1.       IWSN- I Want Sex Now

2.       GNOC- Get Naked On Camera

3.       NIFOC- Naked In Front Of The Computer

4.       PIR- Parent In Room

5.       CU46- See You For Sex

6.       53X- Sex

7.       9- Parent Watchin

8.       99- Parent Gone

9.       1174- Party meeting Place

10.   THOT- That Hoe over there

11.   CID- Acid- drug

12.   Broken- Hungover from alcohol

13.   13. 420- Marijuana

14.   POS- Parent over shoulder

15.   SUGARPIC- Suggestive or erotic photo

16.   KOL- Kiss on lips

17.   (L)MIRL- Lets meet in real life

18.   PRON- Porn

19.   TDTM- Talk dirty to me

20.   8- Oral sex

21.   CD9- Parents around/ code 9

22.   IPN- I’m posting naked

23.   LHS- Lets have sex

24.   DOC- Drug of choice

25.   TWD- Texting while driving

26.   GYPO- Get your pants off

27.   KPC- Keep parents clueless

28.   WTTP?- Want to trade pictures?

1. 
   

"NATURE" covers depression

I am very thankful to Prof Chaterjee for informing me about this issue of 'NATURE' magazine. It has covered in detail different aspects of depression- stigma, treatments, research advancements, everything.

A must read for every person with depression, family member, policy-maker and every mental health professional.

Link is as follows:


http://www.nature.com/news/depression-1.16305

QUALITY TIME

The simple definition of quality time is that you spent time doing something that meant a lot to your child. Sometimes term 'quality time' is used to mean that you please your child by spoiling him so that you can cut down on the amount of time spent together. This type of definition is a gross abuse of the term.

How much time should you spent with your child?-the answer is: spend as much as time as possible in a way not to interfere with developing child's independence or socialisation with other members of community. Following are good examples:

1. Participating in activities of daily living like teeth brushing, bathing, eating, dressing of the child- without hurry or distraction
2. Playing together
3. Visiting places like gardens, restuarants and parks
4. Going around for short walks, to fill petrol/ get money from ATM, buy provisions from neighbourhood store
5. Reading together- the same book
6. Doing household tasks together- like tidying, gardening, cooking- with a sense of play rather than as a chore
7. Doing fun activities like colouring/ drawing/ craft work
8. Play dates where parents also play with the kids
9. taking the child along when you are doing your hobby-tasks such as trekking/ stamp collecting/ star gazing. Finding out what he likes to do and spend time doing such things- even sitting near a road and watching cars go by if he likes to watch cars
10. Listening more and talking less. Listening with interest and a sense of wonder- resisting the impulse to correct him or educate him continuously.
11. Look at the child continuously. hold his hand, pat his head and back, and give appropriate verbal and physical responses.
12. It is not the time to spoil the child. Always limits and rules of behavior have to be clear and child may be treated as equal rather than superior or inferior

TEACHER'S REPORT

Some children have to be examined by a Psychiatrist. Psychiatrists evaluate the case based on detailed history of the child’s development, behaviour and performance in all environments.  Observations and inputs from school are important for proper evaluation of a school-going child.

‘Teacher’s report’ is a description of the child’s overall behaviour (in school) and academic performance.  It should include the following:

General Information

1.       Since when is this child a student of your school?

2.       Attendance- Percentage in last term, and regular or irregular

3.       Appearance and Grooming of the child

4.       Any other general observations

Observation-

1.       Activity levels- average/ dull/ overactive

2.       Attention span- average/ distractable

3.       Does he mostly follow instructions?  Yes/ No. If not, why do you think he does not follow instructions? Is it due to not understanding, or purposely, etc

4.       Overall academic performance. Average/ below/ above

5.       Difficult subjects

6.       Very good at

7.       Discipline and rule compliance. Satisfactory/ not satisfactory

8.       Relation with peers- adequate/ poor

9.       Relation with teachers/ other staff

10.   Any other

Your inputs

1.       Your efforts in school

2.       Do you have a counsellor?

3.       Any suggestions/ other inputs

 

The report should be compiled by teachers/staff who closely interact with child and data should be about the month immediately preceding the reporting period.  The report is a combined effort of all teachers and staff seeing the child in school, and statement of observations should be arrived at by consensus of all observers.  The Teacher’s report should be issued on the school letter-head with a signature of the class teacher, counselor and Principal.  A copy should be retained for records. The school report should be handed over to parents in an open cover.  

Some schools are hesitant to issue school report as they fear it may offend the parents and result in conflict. Parents are afraid that school teachers may be biased against their child or are victimising the child. Most schools issue reports only upon parents’ request. School report should be always issued after taking the parents into confidence, and after taking their consent. Schools should take assistance of school counsellor for making the report. Parents should be explained that the observations are not of one person, but are done by many persons interacting with their child over a period of time. This eliminates possibility of bias or victimisation. Parents should be explained, it is only to assist in helping the child and not for ‘grading’, ‘judging’ or ‘branding’ the child. School report should be drafted in proper technical language, in a respectful tone without using any pejorative terms.  Observations regarding parents should not be included in the report.

One should never lose sight of the fact that the report is for benefit of the child, and nothing will be gained by alienating child or his parents. At the same time much will be lost by not stating problems in clear terms due to fear of backlash from parents. If the parents still object to the report, one has to stand by it and advise the parent to hand over the report to the Psychiatrist along with their objections. They may even choose NOT to give the report; this choice has to be respected, with the offer of issuing another report whenever the parent again requests for it. (Parents sometimes get convinced later). There would be no scope for suppressing or altering the report, as it will defeat the whole purpose.

 

 

 

 

NATIONAL INSTITUTE FOR OPEN SCHOOLING- ADVT

ADVT contains details about website from which other details can be obtained

CENTRAL GOVERNMENT SCHOLARSHIP FOR DISABLED STUDENTS

This is an advertisement offering scholarships to disabled students. Interested persons should keep trak of it; you can apply next year.

VOLUNTARY WORK

This is a list of NGO s working for specific causes. It is a resource for persons who want to do voluntary wor; so I have scanned this list from a newspaper and putit up here.